TLW uses its cover to bring a broad array of men to its readers. Smooth, hairy short, tall, vanilla, kinky, deep, and superficial. We attempt to offer something for everyone over the course of a year. This issue's cover model, Steven Reigns, not only brings a look, but a talent for Creative Writing.
Youth, Promiscuity, and Writing
When did you come out?
At the age of 16
How did that impact your life?
I am definitely more attuned with what younger gays are going through. What bothers me is the lack of support that younger gays receive from the community. Being called "chicken" is not going to boaster anyone's self esteem. Terms like that alienate teenagers from the community, one of the only places they can find acceptance. Gay teenagers have the highest suicide rate. The widespread non-recognition of this fact from the straight community is rooted in the belief that "the right people are killing themselves"
Since you came out at an early age did these issues effect you?
Yes, very much so. I was fortunate to have a great therapist, and Health Education teacher. My Health Education teacher was constantly receiving complaints for the content of her subject matter. Fortunately, the sex education was liberal enough to inform all of the students about the wonders of latex. My therapist helped me with perspective and in doing so, prevented me from entering dangerous situations.
How old were you when you first had sex?
I think of oral sex as sex. My first time was when I was 16 in a convertible, parked in a condo parking lot. It was a grand entrance into the world of gay sex.
Do you feel as if the gay community should focus less of their attention on sexual relations?
I'm appalled at how individuals try to hide those of us in the sexual margins of gay existence. I'm tired of hearing others being put down for promiscuous behavior. Gays have overcome the straight, repressive belief that homosexuality is wrong. Yet it seems as if some cannot move beyond and see that other preconceived notions of lifestyle should also be questioned and challenged. The truth is that part of our identity is built on the fact that we are sexual with the same sex. It is problematic to try to extract sex from something rooted in sexual desire and behavior.
You're aware that this does not only happen in the gay community with issues of promiscuity.
Oh yeah. I socialize enough to hear numerous complaints like: "clubs give the community a bad name;" "bi's need to choose one gender;" "we don't need men running around in dresses to represent us;" " If you're into leather men, you are always hairy and fat." There seems to be a belief that gays should assimilate to what middle America approves of. Some may not like to admit it although the gay community has diversity as broad as the straight community. Their thinking is disjointed. Who wants to be accepted as an incomplete person? The straight community needs to empathetically understand the gay community for all of our eccentric moods and persons.
That is why visibility is so important?
Yes it is. I do not have a rainbow sticker on my car. It is just not my style. I do make people in my life aware of my non-straight status. Visibility is of the utmost importance. The same is true when talking about abuse. If we keep quiet about abuse, it will continue. If gays keep quiet, the oppression and repression will continue. One of my favorite quotes is by Audre Lorde, "Your silence will not protect you."
Do you read much?
Yes, I am an obsessive reader. One of my favorite authors is Anaïs Nin. Another author whose work has altered my life is Sapphire. Her first book of poetry, American Dreams, helped me find my voice and validated my existence as a survivor of abuse and of being a displaced person. I have already marked my calendar for the fall release of her new book.
You write as well, correct?
Yes. I have a degree in Creative Writing. I aspire for my work to be just as inspiring as Sapphire's. She is an idol. I want to always produce works that compel persons to examine their lives and then do something about it.
You're talking about what the New Age movement would call a self-actualized person.
Yes, that would also make the perfect lover. Someone able to take responsibility and capable of love. Until I find that person I will remain autonomous.